About 15 percent of people and dogs are shy (defined as uncomfortable with unfamiliar places or people). Sometimes the people who have shy dogs—often rescuing them from sad situations—are shy themselves. These kind souls take these dogs because of the special empathy they feel.
So . . . you’ve got a shy owner and a shy dog. I bet you’re thinking this doesn’t sound like a recipe for success in meeting the perfect mate. You’re wrong. People who own shy dogs soon learn that the most important antidote to shyness is gentle, loving, non-threatening exposure to safe new people and safe new situations. While a happy-go-lucky dog might do fine just playing with neighborhood kids in your backyard, over time a shy dog needs to be taken into the real world or she will just get worse. Over the years, you’ll probably end up going more places and meeting more people with your shy dog than anyone you know who has a “normal” dog.
Here are a few rules to help your shy dog adjust to new social situations (and a few hints for the shy owner, as well).
Don’t overwhelm your shy dog. It’s important to expose your dog to new places and new things, but it’s equally important not to flood her with stimulation. Take her to small neighborhood parks, not a crowded shopping center. Walk with her quietly; don’t let her get mugged by the dogs at the
dog park.
Carry food. Most people will reach out to pet your shy dog. An outstretched hand coming over a dog’s head is the scariest gesture a human can make, and it will terrify most shy dogs. Instead, carry yummy, gooey, smelly, delicious (to a dog) treats with you. When someone wants to pet your dog,
explain that your dog is shy, but it would be great if the person would give your pooch one of these special treats. A true dog lover will be thrilled to take the gooey, slimy, smelly treat and give it to your shy dog.
Develop your own patter. Dog talent agent Paula Ratoza has a shy Doberman Pinscher who was abused before she adopted him. She says people would often make nasty comments to her, assuming his “hang dog” look was her fault. She learned to explain her dog’s history and asked people to give him a
treat. When they gave him a treat, Paula would tell Higgins “head up” and he’d hold his head up tall and proud as he took the treat. Now he knows the commands “head up” and also “head down”—recreating his old, sad look. This comes in handy when this now happy dog has a role in a television commercial.
Love your shy dog, take her places, build her confidence, and watch her blossom into a happier, more relaxed pet. Just think: The next person who helps you by giving your dog a slimy dog treat might be the kind, sweet soul who will be your perfect match. Don’t be surprised if this new dream date is just a little bit shy. After all, a shy
person has the empathy and heart to understand what your dog is going through.
